Goodbye OTT, Let Us Welcome Exploitation

While growing up, we used to taunt our playmates in the village. Whenever they would find you eating and ask us to share, we would ask them to hold on until we have filled up our stomach to the extent of overflowing. In English, it does not come out well but literally, we would be telling you that we shall give after we are full to the brim.

It also reminds me of the bullies in high school. On one occasion I witnessed a very piteous scenario. A senior three lad found a Senior one student (Nyongo) opening up his bag of ground nuts. The bully commanded the nyongo to, "fill this bowl of mine with those ground nuts till I smile" The Nyongo started filling the bowl, with a keen eye on the bully to see a smile on the bully's face. This he did until he had emptied his entire bag of ground nuts without soliciting a smile from the bully turned thief. After making sure that the Nyongo had no more seeds as we usually called them, the bully just walked away, he didn't smile.

From the above experiences, you realise how hard it is to please a bully, you understand that it is not a good idea to keep turning the other cheek for one whose aim is to smother you.

In 2018, NRM government introduced a bizarre tax on social media called OTT. This action raised the ire of especially the young educated people but our career politicians were not much concerned. Indeed, Bobi Wine rallied his friends in the music industry, arts and the media but political establishments did not give it much attention. 

In the end, the NRM won, the tax was imposed, businesses crumbled and Ugandans moved on. One would think that this would be the last time government would attempt to ridiculously promote innovation while blocking avenues of Ugandans' interaction with the world but this government never gives a damn.

Bobi Wine has solely opposed OTT as a politician

Today marks the end of OTT charge which was introduced in 2018 and one would celebrate but in place of OTT which affected only social media, we now have a 12% tax imposed on the entire internet. Therefore, if you're this NRM old lad who thought that they were only going against social media and therefore you can use email, they have come for you too.

Silence to the actions of dictators only embolden them to venture into more terror. Never shut eyes to the oppression of the neighbor and never feed a monster on assumption that it will get satisfied and leave you. 

To those who think that Napoleon is always right, together we shall walk to the gates of hell.

To all people who stayed faithful to the cause and refused to pay OTT whenever they could, you're the betrayed comrades in this fight!

I, My Photo and The Mask

Yesterday, I walked into a photo studio at 13:55 to perform a duty of great national importance: to take a  photo, in fact a passport photo. 

After Younger had taken my pitcha, I walked out to enjoy the empty, clean streets since I was told that it will take 20 minutes until the photo is ready.

At 14:20 I walked back into the studio and to my surprise, they had already printed the passport photos. I immediately suspected that something must be wrong since people are not known to keep time on this end of the town.

As I paid, and waiting for my change, I naturally pulled out the photos to have a look. I was surprised beyond imagination.

"Younger, are you okay in the head?", I asked 

"Why?"

"How can you print passport photos when I am in a mask?"

"You did not remove the mask, it is not my fault."

It did not end just like that but after wading through the circus, I afforded a laugh; at myself and Younger.

Bride Price Derails Gender Equality

Have you ever imagined appreciating someone, then that person calls you to his home, informs you about the nature of gift he wants, the quantity and the time when he needs it; in the process, you hire mercenaries to head your team of negotiators so that your intended gifting does not have to be too costly; indeed because you cannot agree, sometimes the negotiations spill over to the next day until you strike a compromise; all in the name of your wish to gift someone?

It is a long sentence but that is how dowry/bride price sounds to me.

Internet Photo (May be subject to copyright)

Pope Francis is one of my great inspirations; not only as a spiritual father but a wholesome human being with a heart of mercy, kindness and humanity. At the infancy of his papacy, he made a great statement when he said, "Things have a price and can be for sale, but people have a dignity that is priceless and worth far more than things"

This quote strikes me every time I think about the issue of gender disparity in Uganda which is glorified in action but despised in word, mostly in regard to bride price. The question is, why should we pay bride price?

Going by its name, I think bride price is the price tagged against the female when they are being united with a man to form a marriage; either religiously, or traditionally. 

Ugandans most especially women may deny the fact but some parents out there are looking out to their daughters as a source of income in form of bride price. Indeed, some parents have gone an extra of hiring mercenaries/professional salesmen to haggle/bargain the amount to be paid for bride price.

I find it funny that female activists who passionately preach equality still think that it is incumbent upon the man to pay money in order to earn himself a wife and still treat her as an equal in that marriage; it is ironic.

It is high time we manned up and accepted to have the cake or to eat it; we cannot attain equality if one gender is for sale while the other pays. Okay, some people say it is appreciation, but when is the appreciation coming to the man's side?

We have studied with Nabweteme from P.1 to University, we finish school and walk the same streets looking for jobs, the investment from the parents has been the same, why charge me when I choose to marry Nabweteme? Why appreciate her parents and not mine?

Of course, going forward, this is a post I have to hide from my prospective parents-in-law, lest I derail all chances of ever marrying any one's girl from Uganda. But if anyone ever asks why I wrote, I will say that I meant it!

Behind Every Stupid Plan, Judge Not!

We need to organize a school debate with a motion , "village life is better than town life". I will be the proposer and town people like Emma Bwayo will be the opposer while Ezzy Brian shall be time keeper.

Village life is better because it is real life; town life is fiction. At around that time when the Bodaboda riders in Kampala and other towns were discussing the warship "emeeri", my village buddy was discussing real stuff with me.

He parked his motorcycle for 7 days and went to Kyabazzala in Kayunga to visit his sister with the hope that his sister's husband (his brother in law) will give him some money to clear his daughter's school fees. He spent a week in Kyabazzala and true to his expectations, he was given 100,000. Upon returning, he cleared the 70,000 fees balance. He thanked his muko and he thinks that he should be doing this every term.

The only thing I forgot to tell you is that he spent 60,000 traveling to Kayunga and back. The damn comfort felt after robbing even if the cost of robbing was higher than the loot. 

"How much do you make riding your motorcycle everyday", I asked him to which he said 20,000 or more.

I went on with a barrage of friendly insults, lecturing him about the basics of life and how he should have known that 7 days on his motorcycle would have earned him more than what he actually got from his brother in law.

Educated people move around with a lot of lugezigezi and think that they can lecture everyone about life. So, this guy asked me whether I have ever gone for holiday and returned with a pay check.

"I went off duty for 7 days and returned with enough fees for my daughter. Can any bodaboda rider go for a holiday return with pay?"

That is why town life is better than village life!

Before You Can Fight

Since I got my first beard, I stopped fighting useless battles; those battles which you fight, win but they do not add value to you. I learned it the hard way. That will be a story for another day, let me tell you this one.

One time I received a call from some guy, an acquaintance. It was too noisy in the background and could not hear what he was saying. Therefore, I decided to hang up but he immediately called back and I had no choice but endure the noise to pick out what he was saying;

"Are you near Busiu Police Station?", he asked.

I was working from nearby and I replied in the affirmative.

Then came this guy's request.

"Please help us and ask Police guys to come over and help out. We are here fighting and it is a serious one"

I calmly answered him,

"I see very many people at the Police Station and all the police officers seem to be busy; please stop fighting and ask your colleagues to resume the fight later when the police guys are not very busy."

But before I could hang up, I heard him say something like, "okay, let us just come to the police station"

True to his word, in less than 10 minutes I saw two motorcycles arrive at the police station carrying persons, some of who were bleeding. It must have been a bloody fight!

The lesson I picked is that before you start a fight, make sure that you have someone who will readily come in to separate you; or else, you will kill yourselves.

Before sending the rockets, Palestine knew that gracious people will stand up in solidarity and Israel knew that America was on their side. Israel also had iron domes, they did not spend a night in the stadium praying for a miracle.

Have a nice weekend!

Fixing our Nation as A Collective Responsibility

Just as day follows night, one day we shall wake up when Museveni is not president of Uganda anymore. He will be featuring prominently in the books and news as the former president of Uganda. One whose reign was characterised by corruption, human rights abuse, high levels of poverty, unfulfilled promises, blatant
abuse of the constitution and mass financial mismanagement. Then those who served him as if they were serving an eternity shall be tasked by their grandchildren as why they chose wrong over right. You won't deny it since all your acts of today shall have been captured on internet.

About his going, we are sure that he will and we shall remain with this beautiful country, Uganda. The bad news is that we are also likely to remain with our poverty, corruption and most of the present wrongs. These evils we so much becry will probably continue. It is not because we do not have faith in the upcoming leaders but because, he will not be replaced with angels. 

President Museveni will be replaced with the current politicians; either those in opposition or the ones in the current government. Those in government will uphold his policies while those in opposition will try to forge a different way forward under the same deficiencies. By the general look of things, the issues we have with Museveni's government are the same practices in the opposition parties. I shall not talk about the intolerance, and politics of patronage but the content that the parties are parading, the populism with no concrete evidence of the same being applied in their own institutions. 

Photo of President Museveni (Photo may be subject to copyright)

If they were serious about changing this country, now would be the time when the opposition political parties would illustrate to us by doing what the government has failed to do; create jobs, eliminate corruption and mismanagement within their own parties, but this is not the case.

Very many political parties are sitting on a abyss of corruption and mismanagement.

If they are truly committed to changing the lives of Ugandans, then this would be the time: so that we can see that if government is mismanaging Emyooga, then NUP comes up with its own and shows us what should be done, we need to see FDC come up with a better model of Operation Wealth Creation, and DP show us how Bonabagagale should have been done by practically implementing what they are critical of.

Don't talk about resources; political parties must have the resources to improve their members' livelihoods. If a presidential candidate received billions for campaigns and yet says he cannot raise the same amount in the next 5 years to elevate their members, then know that their promises were hot air, a fallacy or a fantasy.

Am I talking or I am communicating?

Uganda, Why the Rush?

There is a common saying among the young people of Buganda; "Topapa, ojakutomera" meaning "don't rush, you may crash". It seems like this saying needs to be told with illustrious examples so that it can sink into the brains of all Ugandans.

This is my brother Collin Mukhatere

When you find us on the road, we are always in a rush: the push and shove on the streets of Kampala, the overtaking on the roads all over the country, it is always rush hour, laced with a lot of impatience.

When you ask where we are rushing, I cannot exactly tell because same Ugandans are not good with time management. Then why the rush?

When we drive at 100/hr, you may think we are trying to make it earlier than scheduled, for an appointment, but no: most Ugandans never keep time.

Four years ago we invited this "big man" to an event which was slated to start at 3pm.

He confirmed attendance a day before and indeed dispelled our fears of him being late for the occasion.

On d-day, we were all conscious of the need to keep time and indeed we invited the other guests an hour earlier so that by 3pm, all was set. "Big man" was no where, 30 minutes down.

I decided to make this humble call and indeed he picked.

"Hello young man, mpozi your event is today?" he asked

"What is the time right now?" he probed

This is annoying; that someone scheduled for an event is not even keeping track of time of the day and you expect him to remember the time scheduled for your function? Go to hell.

But the end result of our poor management is the rush and push; the reaction without thinking which leads to disasters. Majority Ugandans are in a rush because they are late for an appointment, school or office. This creates a rare of urgency which develops into impatience and the end result is the rampant accidents we have on the roads, traffic jam caused by wrong driving and all evils associated with reactionary behaviour.

Back to our "big man" in the story above; as he rushed to our event, he knocked a bodaboda motorcylist and only his name saved him from spending the weekend in a police cell.

Therefore, Ugandans, we do not need to rush, we just need to manage our time; for all the rushing we have been into, our economy seems not to much our pace because; we rush because we are late.