Trials Of a Village Belle

I want to tell a story; the story of an African woman who tries to break barriers and come out of the vicious cycle of poverty caused, sustained, enjoyed and sponsored by her husband. I am therefore buying a sense of humor but I will weave this story with metaphors, enrich the content with irony and coat it with sarcasm. I will then present it to the readers via social media. If one of your weaknesses is inability to read long posts, do not go further than this.

In my country especially in this year of “hakuna mchezo”, unemployment and under employment are real but surprisingly some people are thriving and they are not worried at all. Those are the artificial elite of Uganda, their wealth is seasonal and not this climatic season but the political season. They remind me of what president Barack Obama insinuated to the Republican Party policy particularly to John Mccain; "Give more and more to those with most hoping that prosperity will trickle down to the poor". Is that not capitalism? Well in Uganda we also have our own "isms" and these are; tribalism, favouritism, and of recent we added racism (courtesy of Kiprotich. Racism means the act of participating in athletic races).

Back to Uganda, one time we were ranked the happiest people in East Africa which some envious people, probably it was Kenyans attributed to our poverty. They claimed that we are poor because we are happy. In return for the insult, we annexed Migingo Islands then went ahead to send our own Munyoro, Uhuru Muigai Kenyatta to become their president.

Back to happiness, I think that we are happy because we are poor.

No competition, no money, no worries. Can money be a problem if you do not have any? Of course not although somewhere in the article I will contradict self but come on, the pastor who preaches that money is source of all evil collects it every Sunday.

Back to our poverty, unemployment and happiness. We are going to handle these topics one by one and by the time we are done we shall have realized why this poverty is not going away soon. Buckle your seat belt, tulla okalile, tuwaye.

Poverty first.

Wakauna Simon was born in 1980 the same year as Woniaye Jackson. Wakauna's father was the defense secretary of the village as well as night watch man at the Nabisolo Primary school where his children attended their school. Just like Wandali his elder brother, Simon did not go far with his studies. If you asked him a question like how far did you go with your education, the answer would be like one of the cartoons. Wakauna did not go far with education because the school itself was not far from his father’s home.

Wakauna dropped out of school immediately after circumcision and married Nambuya who dropped out due to sight complications. One funny thing about Nambuya is that since quitting school she has never complained about her eyes. After all she spends most of her time on the daily routine of garden to kitchen to the well back to the kitchen then bed. All they can do at night is reproducing. They now have 8 children and if it was not for the nurse who chastised her husband at the last maternity engagement that almost cost her a life, Nambuya would be counting 10 citizens to her name. After all the Bible calls on us to produce and fill the world. By the way, it is worth knowing that Wakauna's dad inherited a lot of land from his own father. If it was not for his wife bearing only boys, he could not have sold off almost all the land to pay for "fine" to redeem his sons who keep impregnating school going girls. If he had girls we would call that "imali" but. God chose otherwise.

Wakauna's first-born was one of the brightest children in their class but envious neighbors bewitched him. Now he is on the streets of Mbale. He smokes those long cigarettes. His follower, Bessy recently dropped out and Wakauna made a fortune. From his 16 year old girl he got fine of 1 million and was later given 3 goats and 1 cow. In fact he is just waiting for Jussy to make 16 and also bring home some fortune. Wakauna has convinced his wife that he will be the first person to become a tycoon courtesy of their girls.

Nambuya is a quiet woman, she has been so since her childhood. When her husband boasts of making a fortune from trading her girls, she never replies. In fact she holds back the tears all the time she imagines what life her children are going to lead. What bothers her most is that her husband is proud of keeping their children in the same cycle as themselves. She has never seen any value in goats that can replace a daughter more so no man has gotten rich courtesy of marrying off their daughters. Having witnessed two of her nieces graduate last year, Simon is challenged that they are not likely to witness the same in their own home.

Under such circumstances and give a scenario like the above, a family like one of Simon will always rotate around poverty. All they do ties them to the same spot, same poverty and lack. And because the young don’t have elder siblings to look to, no inspiration shall move them to know the real value of education. Breaking such a barrier sometimes takes more generations.

Now that I am almost making the mandatory 1000 words for my article, I will not talk about happiness and unemployment as I had wanted. These are supposed to be topics of another day. The story behind Nambuya’s bitterness is that she is normally seen as the only failure in her father’s house. For while her sisters persevered and completed education, she had eloped with a son of the village chief. It is no wonder that whenever there are functions in their home, her father is ashamed to introduce her as his child.

This is not the same sentiment her mother holds but she feels the pain her daughter has to go through. There are times when her mother wishes that Nambuya is not invited for some family functions because even when they are speaking Enlglish, it is only Nambuya who will not understand everything that they will be saying. In family gatherings, her opinion is normally brushed to the side.

If Nambuya could only push back the time to 1999, she could have waited a little longer than sleep outside her father’s house, she could have listened to her mother or could put aside her pride, she could have stayed longer in school. 

All We Had Is Now Gone

#Issue 24

Mid last year when I thought that I could by now be walking over the moon, I set out to celebrate 26th March of every year as the most distinguished day in my life. Being one who doesn't value birthdays and other "bullshit" anniversaries that Ugandans are ever scampering to celebrate (even when they know not the origin), I thought that I would break the barrier to at least waste myself for a single day of the 365.

The year moved rather fast and I now find myself on this day. Locked up in my office in Maluku I am not celebrating but trying to put the past behind me and move in the direction not of my calling but preference. Life is too ironical and it is under a few circumstances that we can pride ourselves of being in charge of every aspect of our life. If you don't believe me ask Annet to tell you what Kaweesi thought he would do in 2020 when he would probably quit the police force and seek an elective post in Lwengo. He is nowhere as we speak. Ask Dr Specioza Wandira Kazibwe of what she pictured living with her husband till ripe age, now she is spinster/widow; actually with no title to describe her Marital status, ask Mugisha Muntu what perspective they had in mind while fighting to restore political sanity.

You can come closer and ask Mama Angelina Wapakhabulo if her husband thought there could be a time in Uganda again when a president could rule for more than two terms and beyond the age limit of 75. The examples are very many but we can end with the Tale of Two Persons; Sudhir Ruparelia and Crane Bank Uganda Ltd.

Crane plunged to a loss of Ushs 3.1billion in 2015 from a profit of 50.6 billion just a year ago in 2014. In 2014 Sudhir knew that he had found the niche in pearl of Africa. I doubt whether he had it in mind that he would lose Crane Bank and a number of other businesses just 2 years down the road.

Therefore, my brother, my sister we are not fully in charge of everything because even Gadafi had planned to send a Christmas gift to Best Kemigisha for 2011 but before the fall of that year, he was not a president anymore neither was he on face of this world.

Just like me, I pictured myself at a great social height on this day; I have no doubt that we could have attended the ongoing IAAF World Cross Country that is taking place in Kampala and would have been among those people cheering Jacob Kiplimo as he raised our flag having won gold but things truly fall apart. But all in all we have to be thankful to the Almighty Allah for granting us the mercy to live and witness our lives turned upside down for good or for bad. We should be thankful to nature for not being as selfish as people to let us coexist in spite of our greedy ambition to reap more than we always sow

I need not complain for what happened because it happened and I will never unmake it. Instead my conscience tells me that I can make up for the badness and set it aside by leaping higher than before. I also have no doubt that I will, but the process of overcoming a disappointment needs time, patience and sustained effort. Not that I don't have these but it is because the pain keeps coming back and I remember the time I wasted. Not that I don't put in much effort but because I have to endure the pain of paying double the price for the same measure.

Have you ever questioned the existence of God? I have done so a hundred times. Have you ever wondered whether other people also sin like you do? I have always wondered what colossal, crude unforgivable sin I have committed to pass through the Crucible of life. More so, you have to go through this while your neighbors who you see commit more deadly sins sail through unhurt, unchallenged and happily.

When life's hardships come your way, you start recalling all the sins you have committed but then look at your immediate neighbor and you recall that she is worse. You think of the one night-stand with a stranger but in the same fold you recall that your buddy who was recently introduced by his 12^th girlfriend had at one time raped and has been a committed participant in orgies and group sex. There is a time I thought that my troubles were caused by the illicit behavior of high school when I tested drugs, cigarettes and waragi with Kimera Cyrus my High School buddy but then I remembered that Kasirye Gwanga looks not to be badly off and yet he is a committed drunkard. Then I asked why me Lord?

These struggles of life are real and true but one thing I realized is that they teach you about life; they are clear indicators that happiness is not acquired through short cuts, that people only reap what they sowed and not vice versa. You can never sow what you reaped.

Yes, I have written this so many times and used it to self-console and brush aside my life frustrations but this particular one keeps coming back, it haunts me every minute of life. I cannot actually believe that hour which turned into hours then days. Days turned into a week and weeks into a month. Now it's months and I am still counting. By the way did I ask why me Lord? Surely, why me Lord?

There is nothing as painful as to watch what is yours being taken from you, you raise your hand trying to grab it back but the waves of life seem too determined and because you have tired you let go. Then like a leaf on a big ocean your fortune is carried away, you see it shrinking in size till it goes out of sight and you realize you have lost it. We can also compare it to a plane which carries away your friend and takes him while you're watching knowing that he will never return. I could have also referred to that moment when you lay a friend, neighbor, colleague or relative into that four corner shaped external house but that would be too harsh.

But to close it all I can relate it to when a person falls into a river, you watch while the river swallows him. Knowing that he is going you make an alarm to rally for help and no one turns up. At first you can see his waist then waves sweep him but at least you can see still his head. Lo the waters are unforgiving and soon his head sinks but you can locate him by the hand. Then damn he sinks for good. That is the pain I went through when I lost my treasure. When a person drowns, he or she returns to the shores as a corpse. Just like a corpse, my Treasure returned as a shell of its past self and I have to live with it.

As i write this, I cannot hold back the tears of losing my best; they say time heals wounds but I have seen wounds drive time in my life. No matter the number of times I have tried to move on, the ghosts of Good Friday of 2016 keep haunting me!

Issue 21

Accountability Is The Way To Go!

By Wabuyi Denis

One time I landed on a young man complaining to his peers that his benefactor is mean.

The cause for complaint was a little bit comic but real. This boy would be given money to go and purchase items for home use but every time he was sent would not return the change (call it balance). Being Ugandan, he didn't see much importance in giving back the "balance" or accounting to his benefactor.

To him, retaining a sum as little as 200 or 500 needed no explanation to a man who earns over 10 million in a month.

But this boy was astounded one time when he asked for a book from his guardian; the man reminded him of the 200 he retained when he was sent for sugar, 500 he when he went to buy salt, 800 when he was sent for soap, and 700 when he was sent to buy fuel. He therefore added him 1000 to buy a book of 3000 and bring back 200. Of course he did not have the money as he had used it for whatever;

To make matters worse for him, he was asked to present the book as evidence that he had bought it. This was a stunner and since then, the boy learnt to return change whenever he was sent for purchases. It is a simple example but may be a clear description of our society. We are being faced with a populace which is highly dependent and expectant of provision from the people who work hard to earn their money; there is always that feeling of entitlement, that the world owes us something which is not worse, the worst is the refusal to account for even what we are given for free.

If we were a developed country, we could say that everything is okay because there are those who have worked and they have some reserves to cater for the handouts and other social programes, but to a nation like Uganda everyone of us needs to take the bull by its horns inconsiderate of our position in life, government and society. Even when you're not working, you need to be seen to be working.     
                  

To develop an economy like Uganda from the scratches that we are; we all need to play a part in building the nation and truth be told, all those that will not accept symbiotic relationship will lose their relations and any existing hold to sanity. We need to harness and build a symbiotic sort of relationship because no nation works unless everyone plays their part. However this sustained hardwork should be backed up with a simple principle or rule; Accountability.

And it does not only have to be accounting for money that you received from a person; no but of course money takes first place when we talk of accountability because it alone defines your level of integrity and helps create trust and keep friendship. You can do many bad things to a friend and you bury the hatchet but when it comes to money, it often goes an extra mile into the mud and sometimes into madness!

But before bringing finance, let us look at how Ugandans are still struggling with Accountability;

Mutahi is a husband and a father of three. He returns home after 10 pm everyday apart from Sundays. Mutahi’s children have never known the sweetness of playing with a dad and many times they forget his voice and skin colour. On Saturdays when he would return earlier, he whiles it away with his buddies while watching his favourite team Arsenal. His friends call him a fool because Mutahi says that he can never engage in promiscuous activities like Kundu and Katamba. However, his wife is still bitter with him, his children are never comfortable in his presence. But what does he do with over 16 hours a day? Toil to make their lives better. What would make a difference is if he could sit with his baby mama and tell her where he gets the money that keep their children in the best schools. If he could only account for the time he spends away from home, there could be a jovial mood in the home. He could actually be having twins.

Wanendeya Bosco is in Senior 3. He has a sight problem and does not see the blackboard as well as Ndagire does; he therefore stays back with Ndagire every evening after class and she helps him with Maths. On Wednesday when the Senior Woman teacher found the 2 in a dark corner of the class, she pulled Wanendeya by ears to the staff room and had them lashed for “coupling”. In his mind, Wanendeya regards Ndagire to be a caring sister. That is why it hurts him when they associate their relationship with romantic intimacy. Bosco has never told his teachers that he has a sight problem, not even his parents. He therefore runs late for house chores every evening because he reaches home at 7pm and when his mother asks, his adolescence reminds him that he is a man not to be controlled.

Waiswa wakes up at 4 am every morning and goes to the banks of River Nile not to swim because he can’t swim. Every morning while going to work at Nytil, Zubair meets Waiswa jogging towards his muzigo. Even Waiswa is suspicious of Mukili who he meets every morning in a vest and shorts. Zubair therefore knows that Mukili and Waiswa are night dancers and he keeps telling his children to avoid their homes. However, Mukili was told to start intensive exercise or risk heart attack. Because he has no other time to do the exercise and muscle flexing, he has committed his first hour of every morning to road work on their village footpath. Waiswa was told by his music producer that he needs to work on his voice to perfect his music. He therefore has to wail along the river bank for at least one hour and the appropriate time is night when all other noises are out. It is why he wakes up at 4 every morning.

From the above examples Waiswa and Mukili are doing perfectly what is right but because they have not accounted their actions to the people, in a closed society like Bulyankuyege of Buikwe they were told to vacate the village.

Back to finance; Waweyo went to withdrawal his father’s pension. He spent 20,000 on his girlfriend, used 5,000 to buy pineapples and watermelon, bought a nice watch at 1500 for his mother and some herbs for his father. When he reached home, he explained everything to his father  including 20,000 which he said he spent on “some personal issue”. His father understood and thanked him. Because Waweyo was at campus, they sent Timothy to withdrawal money last month. He bought many things and brought them home but he could not recall everything he bought including the 50,000 he paid to Pande for the items they had taken on credit. He tried to recall but could not remember where 50,000/- went. His father abused him calling him a cheat but he knew that the money was spent rightfully. The issue here is accountability. Waweyo wasted 20,000 on his chick but because he was smart enough to even account for it, he beat Timothy who didn’t waste any money but had a stone for a head.

So many times we have seen organizations start and close in the first 5 years of operation; it is accountability, we have seen relationships collapse and marriages collapse just because people cannot account to one another. We take it for granted that maybe the money is little, I spent just a few hours outside home they will understand not knowing that we are killing a marriage, relationship or business. It reminds me of some incident with my ex-girlfriend. She asked whether she could join me in town and I just told her no, she asked why and I told her not to mind. After helping mummy do the shopping we returned home and being that I was tired, I went straight to bed at 8pm; all the calls my girlfriend made went unanswered. Waking up with no airtime I thought I would call her when I reach office which I didn’t because of an arising situation that called for a meeting.

By then it was 1pm and I had not called her neither did she; at around 5 pm a message came in to my phone; “I did not know that our love could end like this”. Did I say she is my ex?

If this post was too long but you still read it, thank you. It was meant to pass just two messages; communication and accountability, ditch them and you too will be ditched!